My Heart Of Hearts

I'm on the edge and looking down
Or looking o'er but still at ground
I'm looking over, down the ground
And there I want to be un-found.

For founded-not is what I want
And what I want is founded-not
For founded is to feel it not
And feel it not's not what i want

I want to want and have it still
Or knowing wanting having nil?
For knowing having want can kill
Yet still I want to kill the nil

I seek to quench that heart's demand
While heart of hearts sinks in the sand.
As one heart's swallowed by the land
Th'other's lifted by my hand

And I choose which to listen to
I give in to my heart's sweet flute
While heart of hearts keeps sinking through
I do what I don't want to do.

But after that song's played all through
I hear my heart of heart's true flute
And see the temptuous other tune
As having played me for a fool

From sand my heart of hearts now plays
A song I've heard on other days
I've dug it out each yesterday
To listen to it for today.

Michael P. Van Gilst